Monday, August 3, 2009

If You Can Make it Here . . .




Killing an afternoon in New York before my big interview tomorrow on the Today show. I should buckle down and write, but I'm far too wound up: How will I do? How will I look? Will I make any sense? So, instead, I do my favorite thing: take to the city's streets and people-watch.

Here's why I love this place ... at least to visit. In the span of a couple of hours, you see it all here. And more:

A man in a business suit and tie stands shouting in the street, exploding multiple F-bombs and using the universally understood New York City hand gestures for a traffic dispute. The delivery guy whose big truck is blocking the road shrugs and ignores the screamer.

Two young guys dressed like kitchen workers play chess outside with a plastic board, speaking occasionally in Mexican-accented Spanish.

A well-preserved blonde saunters past on Madison Avenue, chattering into a cell phone in French. A shopping bag dangles from one arm. The leash of a pampered white Maltese is on the other. Her tight Bebe t-shirt is bright green, the same shade as the bow on the little dog's
head.

A group of men play a rolling-ball game called petanque in Bryant Park. The best player has on a t-shirt advertising Vieuve Cliquot champagne. Another guy is in droopy blue jean shorts and a sideways ball cap with lots of bling. I'm amazed to see a third in a camouflage hunting cap and a shirt with a logo from the world bull-riding finals. Then I realize this is New York, so he's probably wearing that redneck outfit ironically.

Mama, we're not in little Himmarshee anymore.

Still in the park, I look longingly at a merry-go-round with French music, Le Carrousel. I'd love a ride, but I pass by, too uptight to ante up my $2 and join all the kids. I continue my walk, and see a dozen more New Yorkers carrying on in their unusual manner without regard to what people might think. I circle back to the park. I'm in New York to go on TV and promote my book to a national audience. If that's not taking a shot at the carousel's brass ring, I don't know what is.

I pay my money and choose my horse. A palomino, with flowers on its pink saddle and hooves painted gold. The bell rings, the ride starts. And as I go up-and-down and round-and-round, I realize not a single New Yorker bats an eye at a middle-aged woman on a magical horse.

It's the best 2 and 1/2 minutes I spend all day.

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Faster, faster! Mama Gets Kindle-ized


Just found out poking around Amazon that MAMA DOES TIME, Book No. 1 in my funny, Southern-fried mystery series, is now available on Kindle.

If you think it's strange I would stumble upon news this momentous by accident, then you don't know the book biz. Authors are the last to know ANYTHING. Really. Nobody tells us squat!

I'm not griping, (well, maybe a little). It's just weird to come from a newspaper background, where people can't keep their mouths shut ... hello? We're REPORTERS! ... to this Top Secret, hush-hush publishing world.

All of which avoids the central question about Kindle. For the longest time, I thought the device spelled doom for the book biz. I'm still not sure what it means. But I am pleased that readers of my words who prefer instantaneous, electronic delivery to a nifty gee-whiz gadget now have that option.

At least for the first book. Keep an eye out as you browse Amazon for my Book No. 2, MAMA RIDES SHOTGUN. Do let me know if you unearth the news that it's being offered on Kindle, too.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Clever Title-ists

I have no talent whatsoever when it comes to naming my books. Which is why I'm grateful I have such clever title-making friends.

As a reporter, it wasn't my job to condense my story into a few pithy words that would both capture the piece and intrigue the reader. Headline writers did that, and I was blessed to have some really good ones over the years. Since I never even did it for a short news story, imagine my surprise when it was up to me to title a 300-page mystery.

When it came time to name my first Mace Bauer Mystery, I dubbed it ''Mama and the Murderer.'' Descriptive, but dull. BORING, in fact. My writers' group brainstormed. The book begins when Mama gets tossed in the slammer because she can't explain why there's a body in the trunk of her convertible. Winning title: Mama Does Time. Brilliant! (Kudos to Kingsley Guy).

Same with Book 2, which is set in the saddle on the Florida Cracker Trail ride. I called it ''Mama Rides with Danger.'' ZZZZzzzzzzzz.

Writers group to the rescue with a double-meaning and clever word play: Mama Rides Shotgun
(Special shout-out to Audrey Roberts.)

I managed to do OK with naming Book 3: ''Mama Gets Hitched,'' in which she ties the sacred knot of matrimony for the 5th time. It's out in 2010.

I'm now beginning Book 4, in which Hollywood comes to little Himmarshee, Fla., to make a movie. I'm back to the uninspired: ''Mama Makes a Movie.''

Yeah, I know .... literal and loser-y. So, I put out the word on Facebook: Help!

Man, do I have smart friends. I got back a passel of proposals. Contenders include Mama Sees Stars, Mama's Big Break, Mama Gets Cut, and Mama Gets a Closeup. Using my executive authorly powers, I vetoed ''Mama Gets Botox'' and "Mama Wants to Direct.'' (Ari Odzer, you'r a funny guy!)

How 'bout you? What's your favorite book title ever?

Monday, June 15, 2009

Mama's Out of the Slammer, into the Saddle ... and Making Headlines!

Strange that I had a zillion stories under my byline during 20 years in the newspaper biz. But I'm as thrilled today as a 22-year-old cub reporter making my first crack at 1-A.

MAMA RIDES SHOTGUN, the second book in my funny, Southern-flavored mystery series was spotlighted in Highlands Today in Sebring, Fla. It's especially cool because the Florida Cracker Trail, the setting for the book, passes through the heart of Highlands County.

Check it out: Humorous Mystery Novel Set on the Cracker Trail.

Super job by senior reporter Gary Pinnell, who not only got all the facts right, but makes me sound much funnier than I am. And the paper ran a lovely picture taken by Judge Nelson Bailey. (See below. Got to love that soft afternoon light, at age 50-plus!)

Yee-haw!

During the week I rode the ride as research, I froze. I ached. I ''watered the grass,'' answering nature's call outdoors. But, hey, artists must suffer for their art, right?

What kind of extremes have YOU gone to in order to reach a goal?


Sunday, June 7, 2009

Mama's Gone Abroad




















MAMA RIDES SHOTGUN is en route to Barcelona, Spain.

How cool is that?

My friend Victoria Allman, a chef on posh yachts, pre-ordered the book. She's just been informed by Amazon that it's being shipped today to Barcelona, where she's docked with her yacht captain hubby, Patrick.


The book's official publication date is July 1. But, as with my first one, MAMA DOES TIME, the book-selling giant started shipping almost a month early. So, Victoria may be unwrapping Mama ''en Espana'' even before I receive MY small number of gratis copies from my publisher, Midnight Ink.

Woo-hoo! Quite a trip for our little ol' Mama from tiny Himmarshee, Fla.

Does this mean I can call myself an internationally known author now?